Me, Myself and I

WEDDING PARADE

I attended a wedding this weekend. It was interesting, to say the least, apart from the fact that the reception venue was at least an hour's journey from the church. Anyway, the usual events got underway; according to the programme the 11th item on the agenda was the throwing of the bouquet , in which all the 'single' ladies were required to remain on the dance floor. Now I dont know about you guys but I find this particular ritual quite ludicrous and laughable. Ludicrous because we all know that just because you happen to catch the said bouquet it doesnt mean you are definitely next in line to tie the knot, and laughable because we still do it for the fun of it anyway.
I dont mean to attach too much importance to this, but I cant help but think that guys have too much of an advantage when it comes to such things, especially when it comes to Naija weddings. Its always the 'single' women who get singled out (excuse the pun) at these events and the men get to savour the goods on offer! Back to the wedding reception in question; so the time came for the throwing of the bouquet and all the singletons were being rounded up like lambs to the slaughter. I was trying to be smart and make my escape, but unfortunately was not quick enough and got cornered by my friend's boyfriend who literally dragged us both onto the dancefloor. So I thought, "ok, this might not be so bad. I'll just stand right at the back where no one will see me and watch the rest of them as they all jostle to catch it." But I wasnt getting off that easily! The bride proceeded to announce that we all had to dance around in a circle before she would throw the bouquet; talk about singing for one's supper!!! As the music started and we all started dancing round, I looked around the circle and thought ," Chei, see my life!" there we were parading around like peacocks with brightly coloured feathers displayed for all to see, as if to say "look at me, pick me, pick me!!"
And the men? What do you think they did? You guessed right; they all shamelessly crowded the dance floor, desperate to get a look in , almost rubbing their hands with glee! some even had the nerve to take pictures!! (ok, they probably were taking pics like all the other guests, but I just need a reason to feel indignated). we might as well have had numbers hung around our necks and been individually auctioned off to the highest bidders!
After our ordeal my friend proclaimed that her wedding will be the total opposite; all the single men will be called out and made to vie for our attention whilst the girls get to do all the scoping instead. And I wholeheartedly agree with that! Let them strut their stuff about whilst we survey , nod and shake our heads, possibly award each one marks out of 10. The more I think of this the more I relish the idea. Anyway, sha, by the grace of God, this will not carry on for much longer; before too long you can count me out of the group of singletons who will have to endure this yeye nonsense....in JESUS NAME! AMEN!

posted by Beautifully Human @ 9:41 AM